Look I was in Greece, right
And
I was in this villa, right
And
the villa was pretty smart, right
Built
by this French Designer from the 60s
Only
he built it 2 years ago
Only
he started 7 years ago
Can
I do sth with those numbers?
Later
He
came round
In
his 83rd year (that’s those numbers plus one put next to one another. Just saying)
And
he’s as hot as a dog they say
He
brought this essay by Stravinsky on musical composition and read it to us as we
lunched
In
French
And
we all nodded.
And
his voice was sonor
And
he now dates his Thai masseuse
Who
does not speak a word of anything anyone understands
Except
the Thai.
But
there are none on the island.
Touch
is something, though. And that helps.
Since he had an accident at one point in his life.
I
can tell you he’s elegant, his corset is made out of calf leather from Venice.
The
Villa looks out onto the sea.
The
sea has been there forever.
It’s
clear and it has a lot of funny fish.
I’d
have seen them if I’d gone swimming but I stuck to the pool.
I
don’t trust salt.
It
fools you. You go: Oh, that looks blue and refreshing and then it’s savoury.
Savoury
is not my idea of refreshing. Minty would be. Eucalyptus. Something like that.
He
also brought his dog Lilliput.
Though it’s not particularly small.
It’s very dirty, which
conceptually I liked amidst the drapings of Hermes towels.
But
which I didn’t like practically.
I
still don’t.
I
stroke her, cos she’s too cute not to touch.
Then
I wash my hands cos she is filthy and she smells.
Then
I stroke her again, cos she followed me to the sink.
Then
I smell the stink –
And
so it goes
And
so are hot days spent in the villa.
And
by the villa
As
the dog follows you to any nearby place, too.
For
example the village party
Where
all they serve is meat.
On
a stick, mate.
And
they say there is traditional music. The servants.
And
it turns out synthesisers are the new traditional.
And
I love them, so that’s good.
We
wait and we wait and it turns out we wait for the village to come back from church.
And
I wish I’d known that cos I’m a culturally curious one.
And
I’d have gone to immerse myself, too.
Be
the spirit with us all.
But
then they all came and the sweet sweaty place filled up
It
was outdoors.
But
Greece is hot.
And
I waited and waited for the dancing to start, because what’s a traditional
Greek party without the dance.
And
old and young, as they say, danced. Suddenly.
In
One Big Circle.
If
only it was that easy, I thought to myself.
And
then there was this perfect girl with pink jeans and a white crop top.
Everybody
danced but that wasn’t the point cos she was the point.
EVERYBODY’s
point.
For
example the guy-next-to-us-with-his-middle-aged-wife-looking-grumpy-for-a-reason’s.
His
smartphone did a diagonal move down and around every time the pink bum swayed
our way.
Za
Za Zoom
And
his wife’s face dropped.
No
wonder I thought
No
wonder we all thought.
But
I wasn’t angry at the girl. She was a goddess.
And
that’s what I came to Greece for, the real thing.
They
come from Mount Parnassus to dance.
What
a hip movement, I’m telling you.
Like
the waves of the sea. But sweet so as to confirm my initial aquatic assumption.
Proves
me right.
Served
them, right.
And
the next day the servant told us there were many many fights
Between
couples
Between
men
Over
her.
Under
her breath.
But
of course.
How
could there not have been.
And
one day we went on a yacht.
And
the servant went fishing and came back with something we weren’t allowed to
eat.
But
we didn’t know.
And
we ate it and it was delicious.
And
we were saving some for the next day.
And
the police never came even though his mate joked
Saying
they’d come to ask for him.
And
the servant grew pale.
And
we all laughed.
And
he did, too, eventually.
But
he didn’t look happy.
And
one day I went down to the cliffs and posed for photographs in my Monet swim
suit.
And
I sang love on the rocks so long and so loud till the photographer got the joke
And
laughed a little.
But
I wore red lipstick so I couldn’t laugh cos it’d have gone on my teeth.
I
smiled.
Knowingly.
The
lyrics could have meant something could not have.
And
then he went skinny dipping while I couldn’t get off the rock and I had to sit
and watch.
I
don’t mind.
Although
I wasn’t particularly invested, either.
There
were many bees. And other things.
It
was buzzing 100%
It
was buzzing 100%, 100% of the time.
Not
one quiet second.
That’s
Greece.
That’s
what they don’t tell you at the travel agents.
But
then I booked online. And online they tell you a lot of things.
So
much so that you can’t listen anymore.
But
then the book I read was a novel set in Greece, from the 60s.
You
probably know it.
And
it said the landscape is intoxicating.
And
I nodded, as I understood what he meant.
But
I was not affected to that degree.
The
60s were a different time, mate.
I
thought to myself.
Like who would have ever thought I’d be reading you on a Kindle.
The thing with eBooks is you never get how far you’ve got.
Every page is like the next. Is the next and one before.
Index index sameness calls it magnetic potential
And then someone on the island told me that The Magus is a really long book with hundreds and hundreds of
pages.
And as my days were not like my device
Meaning I can actually see their stack get thinner n thinner
I
knew I wasn’t gonna finish it in the few days I had left.
So
I gave up and started drawing instead.
For
what it’s worth.
You’ve
got to say thank you to people when they let you stay in their house.
But
my monetary possessions are limited.
You
may be fooled into thinking I lie
As
I own a Kindle.
But
that was one foolish afternoon and Argos.
So
I drew pictures for the owners.
But
then messed them up, sadly.
So
I gave them the only photo of me drawing on the outdoor sofa in a straw hat
And
a long flowing dress
Drinking
lemonade.
That
conveys the feeling accurately.
Lemon
is savoury. Lemon is sweet.
Lemon
is imported from other places.
Greenhouses.
The
island is the greenest island in Greece and imports are taxed.
And
yet.
The
world is One Big Mystery sometimes.
That
conveys the feeling accurately.
And
the men played backgammon a lot.
I
didn’t because I can’t.
Left
and right and right and left, it’s all so confusing.
I
tried.
One
has to try everything once.
Like
the cheese pie.
Like
the ouzo.
Like
the moussaka
The
protected species that are a delicacy.
Like
the lifestyle of the wealthy.
I
tried and failed a little.
I
think it wasn’t noticeable.